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Authentic Communication
Thursday, 22 October 2009
When training communication skills, regardless of who is doing the training, a lot of similar material is covered (as long as the trainer is half-awake). Training in communication tends to cover voice tonality and modulation, body language, the words used, props (visual aids and so on), eye contact, interaction with the audience, understanding your audience, and so on. We buy into all of these and more, as tips and techniques, but I was reminded this morning of the single biggest driver of great communication - being authentic.
Listening to the Today programme on the way to a session with a client, I heard Adam Shaw interviewing the COO of Eddie Stobart about his company’s results, and the interview was such a stark contrast to the majority of interviewees (especially the most groomed politicians) that it stuck clearly in my mind.
The groomed politicians you hear on Today, and other media outlets, have usually had plenty of training, plenty of resource thrown at them to assist their communication, and vast support in developing their answers, opinions and themes. If the basic content of a lot of communication training workshops is correct, we really should be eating out of their hands. I would hazard a guess that we’re not though...so clearly the tips, techniques and styles they use are not enough to truly engage me.
So then William Stobart came on the radio. I will confess that I initially thought I’d lost a little reception, as their was a pause in his answer to the first question, but, as the interview developed, it was clear that he had a stammer, stutter, or some form of hesitant speech (apologies for any inaccurate use of terminology - it’s not an area I profess to be an expert in). This is something relatively rare to hear on the radio in itself, and certainly something that some people, and some training organisations, would try and iron out.
I, however, was delighted that it hadn’t been ironed out. William Stobart (despite, or perhaps, in part because of, this factor) came across as a deeply honest, trustworthy, straightforward man who loves his business, his industry, and is happy to openly share his personally held views with a wider audience, without hiding behind weasel words, bland statements, or carefully constructed non-communication.
The simple reason that I was so impressed was not his ability to deal with a stutter - it was the authenticity with which he communicated. Authenticity cannot be trained, as such, but what we work on is training that develops communication skills without removing the character, the personality, and the authentic nature of an individual. Whatever each of our own personal styles are, we can all improve, and improve dramatically in many cases, but I personally resist (and encourage delegates on out courses to resist) any attempts to turn them into clones of the highly groomed, PR trained politicians we hear so much from and believe so little about.
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
The groomed politicians you hear on Today, and other media outlets, have usually had plenty of training, plenty of resource thrown at them to assist their communication, and vast support in developing their answers, opinions and themes. If the basic content of a lot of communication training workshops is correct, we really should be eating out of their hands. I would hazard a guess that we’re not though...so clearly the tips, techniques and styles they use are not enough to truly engage me.
So then William Stobart came on the radio. I will confess that I initially thought I’d lost a little reception, as their was a pause in his answer to the first question, but, as the interview developed, it was clear that he had a stammer, stutter, or some form of hesitant speech (apologies for any inaccurate use of terminology - it’s not an area I profess to be an expert in). This is something relatively rare to hear on the radio in itself, and certainly something that some people, and some training organisations, would try and iron out.
I, however, was delighted that it hadn’t been ironed out. William Stobart (despite, or perhaps, in part because of, this factor) came across as a deeply honest, trustworthy, straightforward man who loves his business, his industry, and is happy to openly share his personally held views with a wider audience, without hiding behind weasel words, bland statements, or carefully constructed non-communication.
The simple reason that I was so impressed was not his ability to deal with a stutter - it was the authenticity with which he communicated. Authenticity cannot be trained, as such, but what we work on is training that develops communication skills without removing the character, the personality, and the authentic nature of an individual. Whatever each of our own personal styles are, we can all improve, and improve dramatically in many cases, but I personally resist (and encourage delegates on out courses to resist) any attempts to turn them into clones of the highly groomed, PR trained politicians we hear so much from and believe so little about.
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
So then William Stobart came on the radio. I will confess that I initially thought I’d lost a little reception, as their was a pause in his answer to the first question, but, as the interview developed, it was clear that he had a stammer, stutter, or some form of hesitant speech (apologies for any inaccurate use of terminology - it’s not an area I profess to be an expert in). This is something relatively rare to hear on the radio in itself, and certainly something that some people, and some training organisations, would try and iron out.
I, however, was delighted that it hadn’t been ironed out. William Stobart (despite, or perhaps, in part because of, this factor) came across as a deeply honest, trustworthy, straightforward man who loves his business, his industry, and is happy to openly share his personally held views with a wider audience, without hiding behind weasel words, bland statements, or carefully constructed non-communication.
The simple reason that I was so impressed was not his ability to deal with a stutter - it was the authenticity with which he communicated. Authenticity cannot be trained, as such, but what we work on is training that develops communication skills without removing the character, the personality, and the authentic nature of an individual. Whatever each of our own personal styles are, we can all improve, and improve dramatically in many cases, but I personally resist (and encourage delegates on out courses to resist) any attempts to turn them into clones of the highly groomed, PR trained politicians we hear so much from and believe so little about.
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
I, however, was delighted that it hadn’t been ironed out. William Stobart (despite, or perhaps, in part because of, this factor) came across as a deeply honest, trustworthy, straightforward man who loves his business, his industry, and is happy to openly share his personally held views with a wider audience, without hiding behind weasel words, bland statements, or carefully constructed non-communication.
The simple reason that I was so impressed was not his ability to deal with a stutter - it was the authenticity with which he communicated. Authenticity cannot be trained, as such, but what we work on is training that develops communication skills without removing the character, the personality, and the authentic nature of an individual. Whatever each of our own personal styles are, we can all improve, and improve dramatically in many cases, but I personally resist (and encourage delegates on out courses to resist) any attempts to turn them into clones of the highly groomed, PR trained politicians we hear so much from and believe so little about.
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
The simple reason that I was so impressed was not his ability to deal with a stutter - it was the authenticity with which he communicated. Authenticity cannot be trained, as such, but what we work on is training that develops communication skills without removing the character, the personality, and the authentic nature of an individual. Whatever each of our own personal styles are, we can all improve, and improve dramatically in many cases, but I personally resist (and encourage delegates on out courses to resist) any attempts to turn them into clones of the highly groomed, PR trained politicians we hear so much from and believe so little about.
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
Being yourself, being authentic, might not be the quickest route to success, the speediest way to climb the greasy corporate pole, or the smoothest journey to the top. But I firmly believe that by being authentic, you stand a great chance of getting to where you want to be, and, most importantly, staying there once you’ve arrived.
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
Please press (at least!) one of these.
It costs you nothing, and (possibly) helps us spread the word!
Please leave your thoughts and comments here
There are 4 comments
– Snape.
November 26, 2009 - 13:40
Subject: Ironing out people!
Firstly, Simon - great blog, as ever!
Secondly, Leys - I am gobsmacked that you were once fired for your stammer! Shocking!
My grandfather had a stammer and having grown up with it I struggle to understand people who may find it a weakness in a person!
Everyday I am surprised by some peoples attitude to others! I work with people with learning difficulties - some of which also stammer - these people are amazing, intelligent, true individuals that happen to be some of my best friends too! It still surprises me that some of my students have this sense of being "not normal" and this is something that has come from other "normal" people around them. I always ask the question "tell me what normal is?" The reply is generally the same - "someone with nothing wrong with them!" .Well, I am yet to meet someone that has "nothing wrong" with them. We all have something, whether it be physical, neurological, chemical, psychological or even if its simply the fear of others different to ourselves!
I am far from "normal". Asthmatic, hearing issues, blood disorder... granted mostly physical or chemical issues but I can also admit psychological issues, most people wouldn't dream of admitting to such a thing. I have suffered from depression and I can have OCD - like the majority of the population! Does this all mean I am weak and useless to society - NO!
I am not "normal" and I'm proud!!!
– Kingston, Surrey
December 03, 2009 - 10:50
Subject: Re: Ironing out people!
I agree with you, Faith, we are not weak and useless to society or to industry. But, unfortunately, many companies do not want to risk employing someone who 'does not look or sound right'. Communication and presentation are now such an important part of business - and business is increasingly service oriented - that not speaking fluently is seen as undesirable. I grant you that we now have the DDA, and a growing feeling in society that people who talk too smoothly might be slightly dodgy - but it is a very real problem. I was fired for stammering a long time ago, in the 80s, when I was a director of a marketing consultancy. All sorts of exciuses are used in marketing or journalism, for example, to 'refresh' or 'motivate' the staff! But when it happened to me I was 31, and had just started a family, and I knew there was no 'cure' for stammering - so I thought I was done for. However, one of the consultancy's clients, BP, asked me to come around and see them. They fired my former employer and suggested I opened my own consultancy, which I did, and pitch for their business, which I did - and won.
November 16, 2009 - 13:18
Subject: Thank You
Leys
Many thanks for your response, uncomfortable though it is to read that someone can get fired for stammering. As far as I'm concerned, that is as discriminatory as firing someone for skin colour, sexuality, gender, age, or any other factors that are irrelevant to people's ability to do the job.
You reminded me of a supplier questionnaire I once had to fill in, about my company's policies on discrimination. The simple answer is that we don't have any policies, and never will, because they will always fail to address the underlying cause of discrimination, which is lack of understanding. We could easily write (download, copy?) policies on gender discrimination, but that wouldn't mean that we weren't a discriminatory organisation, just that we'd followed a particular process for a particular issue and had decided to obey certain rules.
What we think is far more important is that ANY superficial characteristics are ignored in decision making, and that only honest and genuine reasons are taken into account. I'd have no problem hiring an honest person who stammered, or sacking someone who stammered and who was dishonest. Classifying people by their speech patterns (just like classifying them according to skin colour) says far more about the person doing the classification than it does the person "being classified".
Thanks again for your comment.
– Kingston on Thames
November 16, 2009 - 12:17
Subject: 'Ironing out' a stammer
Thank you for this article. I stammer, too, and it does seem that people think I am particularly trustworthy and, as you put it, 'authentic'. But that's about the only good thing! In truth, it's a very real handicap, not just in terms of the struggle needed to speak, but also in terms of the prejudices that many employers still hold. For example, I was once fired for stammering The root cause is a neurological condition, not acute nervousnes or some kind of character weakness. And it often runs in families, as is the case with the Stobarts. There is no 'cure', although speech therapy can help to control it. About 500,000 adults in the UK stammer. It's not surprising that you don't hear many of us in the media and virtually none of us ever manages to 'iron it out'.
LEYS GEDDES
Managing Director, The Active Branding Consultancy
and Chair, British Stammering Association
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